Thursday, November 25, 2010

PETA President Gives Thanks to Turkeys Eaten on Thanksgiving by Sacrificing a Puppy

No puppies were sacrificed in the taking of this picture (Image Credit)
Ingrid Newkirk, President and Cofounder of People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, sacrificed a stray puppy today to honor all of the unethical consumption of turkeys this Thanksgiving holiday, numerous horrified witnesses said.

Newkirk, whose organization, PETA, frowns upon the majority of mistreatment of animals, staged the puppy slaughter in order to demonstrate the moral and ethical qualms associated with eating turkeys in mass quantities, especially as a holiday tradition.

PETA, a non-profit well known for the controversial means by which they convey their message and beliefs, picked up the stray with the understanding it would be given a better life, and proceeding to give it a better opportunity to become a high protein entree during a holiday feast.


When asked why the puppy was not cared for and treated ethically, Newkirk highlighted the irresponsibility of feeding a dog that has already had a shitty life, when it could instead feed those incomprehensibly more fortunate than it could ever hope to be.

When asked if it was eager to be treated ethically and have a better life than it has thus far known, the puppy described its excitement to be cared for, loved, and for once in its life not have to look over its shoulder and worry about being someone's food.

It is unknown if the puppy had yet learned the definition of irony.

1 comment:

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