Sunday, August 21, 2011

A Modest Proposal for Teaching Litterers a Lesson

As members of a civilized society, we are known for our collective ability to work together, identify and solve problems, and act swiftly and efficiently when something pressing is facing our nation.

Challenge accepted (Image).
Nah, I'm just screwing with you.  We're a dysfunctional bunch of clowns that are often times incapable of coming together to change even the simplest of bad habits.  And to illustrate this point, I'd like to reach back to a topic that was ubiquitous throughout my grade school classrooms along with saying no to drugs, sex, underage drinking, and forest fires.  If you hadn't guessed already, I'm talking about littering.

Littering is a topic that has been fermenting in my noggin for a while now.  It is a fundamental lesson that we all learn from a young age, and it seems to be a generally accepted principle among adults to dispose of one's rubbish in the proper receptacles.  However, as well as many of us seem to do with throwing away our everyday waste, there is one specific type of unwanted goods that seems to get a free pass when it comes to social norms: Orphans.


Monday, August 1, 2011

A Clueless American's Guide to the Debt Ceiling

You can call me Aaron Burr from the way I'm dropping Hamiltons (Image).
I know nothing about economics.

For the past few weeks, politicians, pundits, economists, accountants, entrepreneurs, bankers, business people, and regular people have been voicing their opinions on whether or not Congress should vote to raise our national debt ceiling.  For all those regular people that aren't well-educated on the comings, goings, and happenings of the world of economics, you shouldn't be allowed to voice your opinions.  You clearly have no idea what you're talking about.  Since I know you will anyway, though,  the following is a guide to the current debt crisis and its overall significance.  I hope that you find it enlightening, informative, and grammatically tolerable.