Thursday, March 14, 2013

Pope Benedict XVI Having Trouble Readjusting to Fallibility

Benedict XVI is consoled after realizing he may start losing at Jeopardy. (Image)

VATICAN CITY – After spending nearly eight years as the Roman Catholic pontiff, Pope Emeritus Benedict XVI has spent the two weeks since his resignation from the highest position in the Catholic Church struggling with the notion that he is no longer infallible, according to sources close to the situation.

Benedict XVI, who enjoyed almost a decade during which he could express opinions with the confidence that they were indisputably correct, has reportedly found his renewed imperfection troubling and inconvenient.

“It’s truly sad to see how far he’s fallen,” said a source with knowledge of the former Pope’s descent into the hopelessly ordinary ability to have faults.  “Just the other day I watched him absolutely butcher a crossword puzzle.  I mean it’s one thing to be the one true mouthpiece for our Lord and Savior, but ask the guy to think of a six letter word for 'prophylactic' and he’ll sit there and scribble 'abstinence' until he’s just about ready to piss in his robes.”